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	Nome and Paul Van Middlesworth - owners - The Computer Factory Cactus Jack meets Microsoft It was the first week in January 2008. “Vista” was a year old and Microsoft was in five-alarm “damage control” mode. Microsoft representatives fanned out across the land meeting with anyone who would listen in an attempt to salvage some credibility for the floundering operating system. “Cactus” Jack was waiting in our parking lot when we opened at 9:00 AM on Monday. “Get in the truck, we’re late!” he yelled as he kicked open the passenger side door. “Late for what?” I asked. “The dog and pony show Microsoft’s putting on for us PC professionals over at Lake San Marcos Resort.” “Cactus” Jack Trosper owns Rainbow Computer Emporium in the backcountry east of Rainbow. He looks and talks like a “Yosemite Sam” with dirty white hair and a tobacco stained mustache. Jack is meaner than cat crap and treats his customers with utter disdain. Nome can’t stand him but I kind of admire the purity of his total lack of any redeeming qualities. Jack is a man’s man. “I never go to those Microsoft seminars,” I said, “they’re pure drivel. I’m surprised you go.” “Hellooo, they’s free food and booze and all them yahoos from Geek Squad and Fry’s is gonna be there. Gittin to laugh at them bozos all by itself is worth the trouble of goin.” Jack usually doesn’t get drunk until early afternoon so it seemed safe. “Hold on and I’ll see if Nome will let me go.” I turned to ask her but she was already waving at me. “Go now,” she said, “I don’t want that stinky man coming into the store.” The presentation was under way when we arrived. Jack interrupted the speaker and tried to get him to open the bar. He told Jack that the bar opened after the presentation not before and asked him to please find a seat. Jack grumbled and the kids from Geek Squad snickered. The speaker explained that “Vista” was an excellent operating system that had been sabotaged by a devilishly clever misinformation campaign led by Apple and some other anarchists. He asked the group if anyone had a suggestion as to how Microsoft could have done a better job with “Vista.” Jack raised his hand. “Yer first mistake was naming it “Vista,” he drawled. “Why is that?” asked the Microsoft speaker. “Because Vista is a nice little town.” Jack hesitated for effect. “You should’a named it Tijuana.” The crowd went wild. It took several minutes to restore order. The Microsoft speaker composed himself “We are releasing a service pack in June that should fix any and all “Vista” problems.” He announced smugly. At that point a huge roar went up from the Fry’s sales team. “Wonderful!” said the speaker excitedly, “That is exactly the kind of reception we’ve been looking for!” It turned out that the entire Fry’s sales team had been involved in a bowling match on their iPhones. The outburst was in celebration of a two-pin victory over the Geek Squad. At this point The Microsoft rep gave up and opened the bar. I had a sandwich and a couple of drinks. By then the Best Buy sales guys were arguing amongst themselves over whether they could sell service contracts on bottled water and The Geek Squad had started a drinking game that involved bouncing ping-pong balls into beer cups. Jack bribed the bartender into giving him a whole bottle of bourbon and was slumped happily in a corner enjoying the spectacle. I walked back to the store.